Action films are a genre that appeals to much of humanity’s desire for guns, big explosions, and Bruce Willis. That said, they also exploit the appeal of half-naked women and all that their assets have to offer. In truth, sex sells, just as violence does and in the new Simon Edwards directed 6 Hot Chicks in a Warehouse there is no shortage of either.
Set for release on DVD Tuesday, September 3rd, 2019 through Indican Pictures, the film opens with a montage of future scenes as credits play and Hard Rock songs blare in the background. Everything then falls glaringly silent when Miranda, played by Jessica Messenger (Dark Watchers: The Women in Black 2012, Arjun & Alison 2014), receives a phone call from photographer Adrian, portrayed by Oliver Malam (Dead Love 2018, Strings 2012).
Adrian is deemed too creepy by Miranda’s sister, who after some brief godding allows her sister to go. As Miranda leaves the house her father is hypnotized by a machismo advertisement for an item as absurd as its name implies, Pump N’ Gro. In the following scene, it is shown why, justifiably, Miranda’s sister is weary of Adrian as he engages illicitly with his sister and injects himself with an unknown substance.
What follows is an incredulously and needlessly elongated first interaction between the six models and a rather awkward Adrian. Miranda is mocked by the other girls for her kindness toward the photographer as she defends his strange behavior. The group drinks and parties through the course of their risque photo shoots and is seemingly going well. When Miranda is mocked by Ana, played by Sabine Crossen (Hitman 2007, Predator Dark Ages 2015), she verbally eviscerates him as he hides in the shadows listening to the women speak negatively of him. His insecurity and fury with the models sends Adrian spiraling further into depravity as he entrants the six hot chicks into the unthinkable.
Adding to it all, the soundtrack is composed of eclectic Electronica and catchy female-fronted Hard Rock. That in mind, the audio is a challenge to discern even with perfectly decent hearing and even following a volume increase in speakers, it is complicated to hear. Additionally, the choices made by the characters lack any rational or common sense and are made entirely to further the puerile, lackadaisical plot line. The theme and ideals on which 6Hot Chicks in a Warehouse is based have been reincarnated time and time again, and in those forms has quite frankly been executed with far better results. On the plus side, the acting is decent and upon certain aspects of the characters are believable while the girl on girl fight scenes are well-choreographed and easily are the best aspect of the film.
Overall, 6 Hot Chicks in a Warehouse could easily have been condensed into a short film of much higher quality and more appeal. That is why Cryptic Rock gives it 2 out of 5 stars.
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